22 October 2012

triple feature no. 2.

It's time to play catch-up in my Halloween Film Fest reportage. You see, every time I sit down at a computer at home, my new cat Herbert whines at me. Repeatedly. It's really very annoying, and even though I shouldn't let the tiny, furry terrorist win, I usually end up backing away from the laptop and going for the feathers at the end of the stick instead. Yes, I'm fully aware that this is a policy of appeasement. I guess that makes me the Neville Chamberlain to the feline axis powers. I'm not proud of this situation and hope to change it in the future. (If the cat lets me.) Now, on with the show...

28. Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988)

I woke up at 4:30 this morning, and for want of anything better to do until it was time to get ready for work, I downed a cherry-lime energy drink and watched Killer Klowns from Outer Space. In the interest of full disclosure, I should inform you that I'm reasonably frightened of clowns—as any sane person should be—so I was hoping this movie might hit my horror sweet spot. (I should have known better.) There is so much potential nightmare fodder in the circus milieu that it's remarkable that Killer Klowns manages to be completely scare-free. This thing can't even successfully serve up what I consider the cheapest ploy in the horror bag of tricks—the generic jump scare, wherein a suspenseful silence is broken by a loud noise or by something (menacing or not) jumping out at the protagonist/audience. Obviously, Stephen King's It tackled harlequin horror much better—but I gradually came to realize, in my early morning quasi-wakefulness, that Killer Klowns wasn't really in the business of genuine scares. It's just a stupid little movie aspiring to nothing more than distracting an audience for an hour and a half. It succeeded. I was distracted, and even if I can't confidently say that I liked Killer Klowns from Outer Space, I also can't say I disliked it—although the film's entertainment value probably peaks between 1:00 and 6:00 AM.



29. The Innkeepers (2011)

Ti West, even though I gave you credit in your previous film House of the Devil (2009) for trying to reinvigorate the horror film with your return-to-basics ethos and your knack for subtlety—a rarity in the genre these days, to be sure—I can't grade your films only on the basis of your intentions. Sooner or later, they need to be entertaining—or even interesting. Putting Tom Noonan, Mary Woronov, and some satanic bric-a-brac in your movie just isn't enough. Don't get me wrong. I think The Innkeepers is a slight improvement over House of the Devil, but you can't keep ratcheting up the suspense throughout this overlong movie and then just have it all lead up to some clichéd ghost story bullshit. I get it. You like nuance, you like characterization, you like those quiet moments... Well, I do too! But you need to make sure they're heading somewhere. Rather than going out with bang, The Innkeepers peters out with a fart.



30. Young Frankenstein (1974)

I'm not going to say that Mel Brooks' Young Frankenstein is a bad movie—in part because that sounds almost blasphemous—but also because it's really not a bad movie. It's entertaining, enjoyable, fun, et cetera. But there's one thing that Young Frankenstein is not—and that's funny. I just read that this movie comes in at number 13 on the American Film Institute's list of funniest American movies—of all time! Really? What's funny about it? I will concede that there are a couple of funny moments here and there—actually, they're probably more 'cute' than out-and-out funny—but I can't even pick out that many parts of the film that are  even trying to be funny. Much of the thing seems as though it's played straight. Is it supposed to be funny just because Gene Wilder and Marty Feldman are in it? I don't know. Maybe the humor is too old-fashioned for me. Mel Brooks has never really been on the cutting edge of comedy. Theoretically Spaceballs is funny too, but it seems like something that would only make my grandfather laugh—and he's dead.



9 comments:

  1. The only movies I've seen of these you've mentioned is House of the Devil. I liked it but I'm not sure I would think its as good the second time around (whereas I think Rosemary's Baby and The Exorcist were very good the second time around.

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    1. Really? What did you like about House of the Devil? It was so boring. How much time did we spend just watching that girl dancing around the house listening to her Walkman?

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    2. I remember there being a scene early on where a girl was murdered in her car. It seemed to come out of nowhere and it made the whole thing seem really tense. That lady in the attic was creepy, too. I'm thinking of the right film, right?

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    3. Oh, yeah. I have to admit that when Greta Gerwig is murdered in the car, it's very surprising and disturbing...

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  2. I thought Young Frankenstein was supposed to be a comedy. I find it funny.

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    1. I know it was supposed to be a comedy. I just don't think it succeeds as one.

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  3. I'm embarrassed to admit I've seen Killer Klowns From Outer Space. I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be a stoner film, that people watch and laugh at when they're high. The other possibility is that it's consciously trying to be one of those "so bad it's good" movies, like people keep telling me Plan 9 From Outer Space is supposed to be. I can't respect that, because:
    1) I don't really believe in "so bad it's good",
    2) I don't think aspiring to bad of any kind (even a "good" kind of bad) is worthwhile.
    3) If there were such thing as "so bad it's good", then it would almost have to apply to unintentionally bad movies. Otherwise a very bad film intended to be bad would actually be good, thus making it ineligable to be crowned "so bad it's good".


    Oh, and I agree- Young Frankenstein had a few good moments, but none of them were laugh-out-loud funny.

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    1. We're going to have to agree to disagree on this one. I am a fan of many of 'so bad, they're good' movies. (In fact, one of my favorite TV shows of all time Mystery Science Theater 3000 is sort of predicated on the concept of so-bad-it's-good-ness.) But in general, I agree that for these movies to be entertaining they usually have to be unintentionally bad movies. When writer-directors actually attempt to make so-bad-they're-good movies, it usually doesn't work.

      Showgirls may be the best so-bad-it's-good movie of all time...

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    2. I agree to disagree, but maybe I need to soften my position a little. Since writing the above, I have recalled several movies that I enjoyed making fun of with my friends, and those were some good times, so there is some entertainment to be had from the combination of bad movies and good company, and usually alcohol too. TimeCop has so many time-travel inconsistencies in it, and gaping plot holes, it is fodder for a lot of snarky fun, if you're with the right bunch of friends.

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